The Story Of My Heart...

Sunday, April 30, 2006

have u ever

Have you ever felt an undescribable pain?
The way u feel all crunch up inside.
So powerless.
So alone.
So cold inside your heart.
That you'll just want to run away and hide in a corner?
**
The kind of feeling that makes you want to just break down and cry.
And Leaves you ever so confused.
You try to make sense of the sadness, hopelessness you feel.
But finds no answer.
**
Do you ever feel so tired?
That you ask yourself whats the point anyway?
Like a butterfly with broken wings, you flutter around in a web of time.
Lost.
**
If only we can control everything, then it'd be alright.
But is that true?
**
Can you relate to what i'm saying?
The tears come fast.
Insensibly.
Everything seems so hopelessly funny and silly at the same time.
Sometimes its just so scary.
**
Like a horror movie.
You feel like a kid again.
Where the lights are off.
The doors are locked.
Your head under the blanket.
Grabbing on to your teddy.
You fear what might spring upon you, from the shadows of the dark.
**
You know that its just a passing phase.
Yet, feel so horribly scared at the same time.
Can we ever make it?
why does everything seem so easy in the past, but becomes more difficult as time goes by.
**
I hate it when we can't say or describe what we feel inside.
Why can't everything be as easy to solve as simple math equations.
Where there's a right/wrong answer.
Where everything can be sorted into black/white.
What's it like to not be able to tell what we want to say?
Your heart flutters and screams to be let out.
Like a bird with broken wings.
There's this *stuck* feeling.
Can't you just understand?
**
They say everything gets easier as you grow up.
BUt where's the easiness in this?
I'll give anything to go back.
heh.
Life's a piece of cake.
I'll take it as it comes.
I'll just not say anything.
**
Like when somebody asks you.
How's everything?
How'd you put it to them?
Everything's so indescribable.
**
When everything's bearing down on you.
You feel so torn up inside.
Why?
**
Again.
Your heart screams to be let free.
To speak those words.
And for everything to be right in the end.
**
Its scary.
I agree.
-disappearing day by day-

**xoxo cher at 11:50 pm
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